As I look outside my office window, fresh snow blankets the normally ugly landscape, hiding the litter and grafitti and transforming my view into one of beauty. I have heard fresh snow likened very often to the grace of God, which makes all things new, but the analogy has never sat so well with me. I know this beautiful snow will turn brown from the fumes of passing cars, will get trampled and kicked and within a few hours will no longer be so pristine. I can't believe God's grace is also so easily tarnished!

Sometimes God is so tangible it is easy to know He is by my side every minute of every day. Everywhere I look, I see evidences of his active involvement in my everyday life. But just as often, it seems quite the opposite and I sympathize with those who see God as far off, distant, and as the Watcher of life, rather than the Author, Creator, Sustainer... This week has been one such week, where my head knows God is with us, has not abandoned us, is actively involved, but my heart doesn't quite join in with such assurance. Maybe it is the "friendly fire" of well-meaning Christians who wound so deeply with their criticisms, or the unwelcome realization that some of my young leaders have been putting on a pretty good face when at ICYA and have a completely different one when in their own homes, or the weariness of going from one crisis mode to the next... what triggers it, I am not sure, but at times like these I rely on grace that is more permanent than the purity of fresh fallen snow... I rely on a grace that will hold me both in this life and the next: "I know whom I have believed, and am convinced that he is able to guard what I have entrusted to him for that day..." (2 Timothy 1:12b) I am so thankful that I serve a God who is not afraid of my weakness, but rather uses it to glorify himself by his own power (2 Corinthians 12:9) - WOW!

So as you pray this week, please keep me in your prayers. I feel I am getting drained just dealing with interstaff issues and life at home, and am only giving leftovers to the kids.

Thank you!