Flickering

"You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven." (Matthew 5:14-16)

Colossians tells us that we have been rescued from a "dominion of darkness" (Colossians 1:13) and at times that darkness seems darker than before. Yet we, as believers, are called to be a light. Sometimes we may feel like we are a blazing torch, for all to see (or, more likely, we feel like somebody else is that blazing torch and we're just pinpricks). Other times, a flickering candle is the most we can say.

In the North End, darkness is constant, yet there have been a few stories lately that have inspired me: a few little candles flickering away against this dominion of darkness, and I want to share some of these stories with you. Names have been changed to protect privacy.

Danica is a sweet 10 year old who comes faithfully to drop-in. One of our workers often meets her on her walk home from school, and they share conversations about how their day has gone. One day, in particular was inspiring. Danica was a little down that day, and she explained class had ended with a period of silent reading. She said she and her friends have decided to read the Bible together during silent reading. They love doing this, but have recently started to get some trouble for this. The other kids have begun to make fun of them and give them a hard time. But Danica just shrugged her shoulders and said it didn't really matter: she really liked reading the Bible and it was more fun when she could read it with friends, so she guessed they would just keep on pulling it out in class whenever they had the time. She figures its worth it.

Moe comes from a tough family: his older brother, whom he idolizes, is in prison, and his younger sisters seem to be forever in and out of the youth centre for their crimes as well. He's the only one in the family who has stayed out of crime, and it makes him look like a sissy, to his family. He tries his best to find ways to relate with his family so as not to be totally alienated, but the options are few. His dad likes to smoke pot together, and his brother, when he's home, loves a good drinking party. Moe tries to keep clean, but continually struggles with balancing his love for his family with his desire to please God. Last week his brother managed to organize a drinking party at his place for his friends and family members. Moe struggled with what to do: he knew he wouldn't be able to stay away from the drugs and alcohol if it was in his home, that accessible, but he had to keep face somehow. The next day we asked him how it had gone: he had decided he was not willing to risk himself for the sake of a party, so one by one as partiers arrived, he sent them home. Not bad for a 17 year old.

Sarah is a crack cocaine addict. She's had it tough. Her love for her children is what gave her the push to try, one more time, to break her addiction. Just as she made the decision to quit, the father of her children decided to come back into their lives. Unfortunately, he also brought trouble as he sought new funding for his drug runs to northern isolated communities to make money. Sarah tells me it was one of the toughest decisions of her life to ask him to leave. She felt like having to choose between a father for her kids, or the new life she wants to pursue
. Because she could not bear facing temptation like that again, she made the hard decision and is now celebrating her 40th day clean, praising God for his strength that has brought her this far, and asking God to be the Father her children need.

"For this reason, since the day we heard about you, we have not stopped praying for you and asking God to fill you with the knowledge of his will through all spiritual wisdom and understanding. And we pray this in order that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and may please him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God, being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience, and joyfully giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in the kingdom of light. For he has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into the kingdom of the Son he loves, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins." Colossians 1:9-14