Words seem inadequate.
I have been sitting in what used to be our craft room. It has been turned into something else, for this week at least. The walls are covered in photos, letters, and colouring pages. Couches have been brought in, candles lit and music plays softly in the background.
Volunteers sit, praying quietly as they watch children slowly come and go, staying just long enough to make their own contribution to the wall, or just to sit close enough to a volunteer for a hug and a new Kleenex before facing the world again.
We are in mourning.
Sunday morning our friend, Kathleen, age 11, hung herself off a tree in a vacant lot only four blocks away from where we now grieve.
Why, we may never know. Oh, there's speculation: bullies, a dare gone wrong, grief over her father in jail, a copycat over her brother's failed suicide attempt in the summer... All we really know for sure is that we have lost a friend. Kathleen, with her sassy tongue and clever wit, who was the protector of her younger siblings and cousins, who was the ringleader in initiating a game of tag, an outing to the park and sometimes even trouble. Kathleen, who was so close to her friends that sometimes you'd mix them up, even though you knew the difference, just because you never saw one without the other anyway. Kathleen, who'd knock on my back door to demand cookies and juice after school. Who wore her flourescent vest to drop-in, hours after school was finished, because that's how proud she was to be a crossing guard. Kathleen, full of energy and zest for life...
We will miss her.
I will miss her.
A lot.
Photo: Kathleen is the one in the centre left. This was taken at Gem Lake Camp.
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